From the stars, on a mountain, with the bears, my beads…and paint.
From the stars, on a mountain, with the bears, my beads…and paint.
From the stars, on a mountain, with the bears, my beads…and paint.
From the stars, on a mountain, with the bears, my beads…and paint.
Regarding my Magic-of-Home doll
Women have been making dolls for millennia. Dolls are made of just about anything you can imagine. Fiber, fabric, leaves, sticks, bark, moss, cloth, anything you shape and mold. Dolls open your imagination, open it to possibilities, and open your creativity. Dolls can help you take charge of your own path. You can ask for help, bravery, magic, stories, friendship, the list goes on. Put yourself into a new mindset embodied by your doll to help you stand tall, get thru a conflict, or overcome a fear. Shift into a new way of being in the world by making your doll you as a pianist or dancer, artist or scribe.
When I was a kid I had Raggedy Ann. Oh did I love my Raggedy, gifts (yes, I had several) from my Grandmother. I used her soft flat wisdom-filled head as a literal shield, her face over my face as I slept, sheltering me from the scary childhood things in the night. She was about the size of my cat, which I suppose at that time was perfect because I was so devoted to him, Archie. They became partners in my care, superheroes that slept next to me, protected me, inspired me, comforted me.
Dolls can be all sizes. Sometimes THE LITTLE IS REALLY THE BIG which my teacher Julia Inglis said many times. Now I know exactly what she meant. This small doll fits in my hand but whoa is she mighty. This itty bitty sculpture of fiber got me onto an airplane when my mind, body, and every bit of me was saying hell no, we won’t go! She didn’t bully me nor was she rude. She patiently took my hand and guided me every step of the way.
Does it seem weird that a grown person carries a doll in her pocket? After all, Vasilisa of Baba Yaga fame is a child. I don’t think it’s weird, now I know it’s natural. Much of the time our adult fears are based on ideas we embodied as kids. We end up carrying that reluctance our entire lives unless we as adults gently take our fears by the hand and deal. Sometimes just owning or naming the fear is all it takes and poof, that fear is out the door.
This doll is really just a symbol, a hand-held talisman of what it is I want to embody now. I wanted to bring the feeling of safety I have in my home, on our land, and in my body while I’m at home, with me on a big trip. I spent time with this little one and the idea of safety at home as I was making her. She was on my desk as I packed and we planned. All that time I was infusing her with my grounded way while at home. It worked. My experience on that trip was revelatory. Not only did I enjoy myself but because I overcame my fears, I added a super power to my tool box.
Look at her. She’s been thru it. Her head is wonky and her arms are getting really long. She lived in my pocket, in my backpack, walked on the beach, sat on my windowsill with one of the most beautiful views on this planet, slept under my pillow, took rides in my purse, the whole trip spent in my company. Some days I pulled leaves or sand or sticks or dried seaweed out of her fibers. She has never been lost by some miracle and is VERY dear to me. I don’t think I’ll redo her, straighten her, make her more perfect. She’s not concerned with such things as outer appearance. All she really cares about is that her mighty heart helps me to feel mighty.
From the stars, on a mountain, with the bears, my beads…and paint.
I never understood the fascination with ravens. They seemed to be the spirit animal for beaded elders and yogis of the new age realm. But not long after we stopped moving all over the place and settled into our land in Vermont I started to notice these incredible birds.
There is a different quality to the outdoors when the leaves are on the ground, buried under snow. If you know winter, you know what I mean. Every sound seems more intense, more pure, more resonant. All the background noise is absorbed in the snow. You can see thru the trees that block the view all summer. Where I live the ravens play on air currents reflecting the shape of the mountains. Sometimes you can get lucky and hear 2 or 3 or more communicating between trees or across the valley. They light fifty feet up in the tops of giant white pines and chatter to each other, saying, “it is a glorious day from atop my tree! ” And then comes their rattling clicking sounds, back and forth from one to the other in turn. They’re lovely conversationalists with low gurgles or sometimes sound like angry women, “ack!”
With my back against the trunk of the white pine I want to catch every syllable. My whole body is listening. Can I please just always remember these songs to pull out when I need a moment of nature magic? There are quiet, almost nasal grinding sounds I can only hear when I stop breathing. They’re whispering the raven way. I wonder how they make these noises, so not-human. Are they coordinating who will find dinner or when to pick up the kids? There are quick staccato notes like a stubborn child practicing their scales on a piano, up and down over and over. “Hey, listen to me!” Some sounds are a warning about predators, announcing food opportunities, or calling in the neighbors to gather for a meeting. If I have to put raven music in a genre it would be categorized as pure play. Complete joy. Happiness. Celebration.
I’ve experienced ravens talking beyond the usual “caw!” only a handful of times, always in the mountains and always in the cold. They communicate the goings on they see from so far above, so different than my vantage point, gravity keeping me planted firmly on the ground. If I’m really quiet, I can hear the air moving against their feathers as they fly above, showing off, showing me what it’s like to be airborne.
Fun factoids about the Raven: They’re smart. Like, dolphin smart and able to figure out multi-step puzzles. They mimic sounds of all kinds so they might meow like your cat. They are the morticians of the sky, cleaning up dearly departed wildlife. They play, alone, with others, with sticks, slide on roofs, rocks, balls and other animals. Ravens live up to 17 years in the wild, or up to 40 as a pet. They hang out in young gangs eating and marauding together until they pair up to mate. A flock of ravens is called an UNKINDNESS, which seems sort of rude to me.
The art above is a scratchboard raven I did for an intensive I’m collaborating in called The A.R.T. of Becoming A Witch. I know, witch is a loaded word that gives off all sorts of smells! But this is fun and good and worthy and you can join. It starts this coming Sunday, March 26th on zoom and is all about deepening our awareness with our senses, using the animal, plant and mineral kingdoms as examples of knowing. Check it out! https://janetconner.com/art/
From the stars, on a mountain, with the bears, my beads…and paint.
Here’s the star nosed mole, an inspiration if ever there was one. A few characteristics: nearly blind, lives underground in swampier areas (we see them where I live in Vermont), 22 appendages called RAYS are in place of their nose, the fastest eater, the most sensitive touch organs in the animal kingdom, and the list goes on. An odd and seriously cool creature. Can you imagine using your face to know where your prey is, not by seeing but be feeling that creature’s electrical impulses? yep. Their nervous systems are so efficient they send impulses to their brain so fast it tests the physiological limits of neurons. And they can smell underwater. I’ve never really thought to try, I’m not certain I’d even want to. They blow out bubbles and suck them back in to pick up odorant molecules. Amazing.
I’m about to embark as a collaborator in an intensive called The A.R.T. of Becoming a Witch. It all happens on Zoom so anyone can participate. We are going to learn about how humans “gate”. It’s basically a survival technique where as young people we shut out what can become too much information for us to handle. Some of what we instinctually shut out we can deliberately open back up to. Hearing. Seeing. Feeling and the list goes on. Come and play with us. The link is above. You might just find you have something in common with the Star-Nosed Mole.